Karoline Kowalczyk, MA, LCSW

Hi! I'm Karoline--a Polish-born, Chicago-raised psychotherapist who has been serving the Chicago community for 14 years. People see me as genuine, down-to-earth, and warm. I graduated with a Master of Arts in Social Work from the University of Chicago Crown Family School of Social Work in 2010. I started my career working in community mental health and then in a psychiatric outpatient clinic at a major academic medical center. Since becoming a fully Licensed Clinical Social Worker (L.C.S.W.) in 2012, I always had a side private practice and in 2022, I transitioned to full-time private practice. I have additional post-graduate training in psychodynamic therapy, EMDR, couples therapy, and general trauma treatment. I only work with adult individuals and refer out to couples therapy. I enjoy working with a wide range of concerns, and I specialize in trauma, dating, and attachment. I have also throughout the years successfully treated many complex anxiety issues. I incorporate cognitive theory, advanced knowledge of modern dating, psychodynamics, interpersonal neurobiology, and EMDR in my approach. I pay attention to how culture and our environment shape our mental health, as well as how the mind and body are deeply connected. On Trauma, Attachment, and Authenticity What is trauma? The word "trauma" can be used for something that disrupts your core belief about life. Trauma can significantly impact one's authentic or "true" self. It not only distorts our view of the world, but also of ourselves. In his book entitled, The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture, renowned trauma and addiction expert, Gabor Maté, writes,"[a]uthenticity's only dictate is that we, not externally imposed expectations, be the true author of and authority on our own life (p. 107)." Dr. Maté goes on to write, "[o]r a child may internalize the idea that 'I'm lovable only when I'm doing things well,' setting herself up for a life of perfectionism and rigid role identification, cut off from the vulnerable part of herself that needs to know there is room to fail--or even to just be unspectacularly ordinary--and still get the love she needs (p. 107)." In this predicament, this child starts to believe that in order to be attached to her caregivers, she needs to be a certain way. Dr. Maté goes on to write, "[i[f the choice is between 'hiding my feelings, even from myself, and getting the basic care I need' and 'being myself and going without,' I'm going to pick that first option every single time. Thus our real selves are leveraged bit by bit in a tragic transaction where we secure our physical or emotional survival by relinquishing who we are and how we feel (p. 108)." Trauma treatment often entails exploring and processing traumatic experiences, developing self-compassion, and cultivating a sense of safety and trust so you can reclaim a more authentic sense of self and a more balanced view of the world. When it comes to dating in the modern world, if you are operating within a more authentic sense of self, you are less likely to fall down its pitfalls. For example, if you are the adult version of the child in Dr. Maté's example and have learned that in order to be in an attachment, you had to hide your feelings from yourself, you might overlook your date's questionable behavior or personality. Whereas, your authentic self might recognize that this kind of person will not bring you the peace and love you are worthy of. I look forward to providing you with a safe and unconditional space that can facilitate the process of reclaiming your authenticity. I welcome regular feedback as we work together as this helps grow and maintain a healthy therapeutic relationship. Insurance note: If you have a Health Savings Account (HSA) and will be using those funds to pay for therapy, please make sure you understand how an HSA works and that you are most likely going to be paying for the total cost of therapy until you meet your high deductible. This article does a good job of explaining the pros and cons of HSAs: https://www.investopedia.com/articles/personal-finance/090814/pros-and-cons-health-savings-account-hsa.asp Book/resource recommendations: What Is Psychotherapy? by The School of Life The Finding Solid Ground Program Workbook: Overcoming Obstacles in Trauma Recovery by Schielke, Brand, and Lanius A Single Revolution by Shani Silver The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture by Gabor Maté In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction by Gabor Maté Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski Yoga for Your Mood Deck: 52 Ways to Shift Depression and Anxiety Cards by Amy Weintraub Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma by Peter Levine Attachment in Psychotherapy by David Wallin Living the Life Unexpected: How to find hope, meaning and a fulfilling future without children by Jody Day Wired for Love: A Neuroscientist's Journey Through Romance, Loss, and the Essence of Human Connection by Stephanie Cacioppo All of Us Strangers (2023) film directed by Andrew Haigh (beautiful depiction of attachment) Mindfulness for Beginners by Jon Kabat-Zinn CD available on Audible Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristen Neff Self-Therapy: A Step-by-Step Guide to Creating Wholeness Using IFS, A Cutting-Edge Psychotherapy by Jay Earley Psychopath Free: Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People by Jackson MacKenzie How to Survive the Loss of a Love by Colgrove, Bloomfield, and McWilliams The Inner Level: How More Equal Societies Reduce Stress, Restore Sanity and Improve Everyone's Well-Being by Richard Wilkinson and Kate Pickett How to Do the Work: Recognize Your Patterns, Heal from Your Past, and Create Your Self by Nicole LePera Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel The Mindful Brain: Reflection and Attunement in the Cultivation of Well-Being by Daniel Siegel The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel A. van der Kolk Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life With Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapy by Francine Shapiro My credentials in detail: Private Practice, Psychotherapist, 2012-present Rush University Medical Center, Adult Outpatient Psychiatry, Psychotherapist and Programs Coordinator, 2013-2022 Turning Point Behavioral Health Care Center, Psychotherapist, 2010-2013 Turning Point Behavioral Health Care Center, Therapy Intern, 2009-2010 Gottman Method Couples Therapy Level 1, 2022 EMDR Institute, EMDR Basic Training Parts 1 and 2, 2021-2022 University of Chicago Crown Family School of Social Work, Certificate, Advanced Psychodynamic Fellowship in Clinical Practice, 2020-2021 University of Chicago Crown Family School of Social Work, MA, Social Work, 2008-2010, Independent study coursework in Interpersonal Neurobiology and Mindfulness, GPA 4.0 University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, BS, Psychology and Spanish, 2004-2007, semester abroad in Granada, Spain, GPA 3.9 Grinnell College, 2003-2004, studied English Literature, GPA 3.7